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Machine

Posted by casey on March 25, 2015 in Baby Kaz III

Dear Baby Boy,

Yet another month has passed since my last public update on you and thankfully you are still safely growing away because this past month is just one long blur of contractions.  You see, I apparently, or I suppose I should say “we”, are a contraction machine.  Steady and strong and unwavering.

These lovely reminders of what labor really is come and go all day and like to pick IMG_5411[1]up both in intensity and regularity while I sleep.  The middle of the night has been a blur of “Ow, what is that? Why is it still there? Ow I am uncomfortable. Oa, again? Oh…contractions.”  The average is a good two hour session of pit to peak predictable contractions about 2-4 minutes apart. Wahoo!  The nice thing about the middle of the night sessions is they are very easy to keep track of because nothing else is going on and I can quietly get up and work through them on my own uninterrupted.  The bad thing is I spend most of that time just waiting for them to stop not wanting to make a before dawn trip to Labor & Delivery for what I remain confident is you just toying with us.

Son…this is your mother speaking…stop it.

And so we contract.  We wait.  We do it again.  And again.  And again.  And then Mommy finally complies and gets checked.  It is just that I am confident that you are fine and things are fine, but I am also confident that when you really turn on the machine they are identical to when labor started with Caden.  So the mental game goes back and forth and so on.  I am more mentally exhausted from the constant question and am physically getting lots of yoga and mental strength practice.

IMG_5489One day during our 29th week we finally ended up in Labor and Delivery because they wanted to monitor both the contractions and you to see what was going on.  Your brothers and I loaded up with games, snacks and snugglies and headed down to the hospital for an adventure.  First and foremost, your brothers were awesome.  They were VERY excited when we arrived, never having been there before and when we went back to a full Labor and Delivery room and they saw the baby bed decided you were going to come that day. I assured them that we hoped that was not the case.  What I found interesting is that even though I did know I was and had been contracting, when they hooked up that monitor, BAM, contractions all over it.  Sometimes it is just a little surprising to actually SEE what you know you are feeling, especially when that shouldn’t really be the case.  But, as usual, and thankfully, you were fine and these pesky contractions weren’t actually changing anything internally in starting or preparing my body for labor (other than the practice as a whole).  We waited and watched and eventually it was decided to go ahead and give me a shot to stop the contractions to try to slow things down and give me a bit of a break.  That was one of those “So this is what my belly being relaxed and not painful should feel like,” moments.  I of course was aware of the tension and pains, but having grown used to it over the past month, and the weeks before when they came and went sporadically I didn’t actually realize just how much I had been working through the pain and tightness of.

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After a nice half day stay we packed up and went home to rest and hunker down before yet another snow came.  Trying to rest but also trying to be normal.  Balancing keeping you in but knowing so far they haven’t changed anything so going about daily business. It is a fine tight-rope act so that I don’t encourage them to be working contractions and land myself on full on bedrest. Super fun.

You my third son though, are growing and growing STRONG.  Your movements are constant and BIG.  You roll, dance, push and kick/punch all the time. So there is no doubt that you are perfectly fine (or highly uncomfortable and squished) each day.  You give me plenty of reassurance in that department.  In fact, you even move so much while I am sleeping that you tend to wake me up with my belly shaking about.

Son…this is your mother speaking…stop it. We are sleeping.

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We are nesting, BIG TIME.  Also a fun fact, I tend to have an overwhelming feeling of needing to get some sort of project or baby thing in order/prepared/finished prior

22 years of Friendship at 32 and 34 weeks

22 years of Friendship at 32 and 34 weeks

to the big sessions of contractions.  I fought it for a long time and finally, finally we are getting to work.  Your room is really starting to come together, thought I got myself into projects like sewing your curtains that was probably something I could outsource. But when a fabric speaks to you…and your hormones…it well, speaks to you.  To-do lists of mental nesting have been filled out to help organize the madness, and errands in preparation are being tackled.  Another balancing act.  The “we are having a baby and we have nothing ready vs. meh…we will run to the store when we get home because I am tired” challenge.  It has turned out that it being three and a half years since our last newborn, and really five years (plus pregnancy time) since we have gotten or refreshed much and it is a little surprising how much we don’t have anymore or has simply been just too loved on to survive.   Just typing that makes me want to start running errands right now.  Instead I will sit here IMG_5645[1]battling pre-dawn contractions and keep writing.

Your brothers are getting anxious to meet you as are we.  They love to feel you move and often request to have you kick them.  I think that will change.  Also in the department of what I think will change is their current discussion over who is going to help change more diapers.  Everett who loves to tell us all about “the baby brother” and what you will (sleep, cry, snuggle) and will not (walk, bounce, play superheroes) be able to do when you get here is quite positive that your stinkies will he his job.  Caden is Ready.  Ready to help, ready to love on you and ready to be the biggest brother.  Caden loves to especially feel when you have the hiccups which starting during my 28th week I can feel at least three times a day.

We are soaking up this time of relative peace and preparation, embracing the familIMG_5592y of four we know while anticipating you being here with all of us, not just me.  While this has been a very different pregnancy with the daily injections, still on nausea meds, became anemic this past month and contractions it is always a time I cherish for the wonder that it is.

You keep growing and we will keep preparing, though most of that is more for us and than for what you really “need”.  We did take care of one thing you will need though…a name!  Per tradition though that is our little secret until your birthday but we will dangle it out there to keep everyone at bay a bit.  See you soon son, but not too soon!

With Lots of Love – Your Mama

 
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Eight and Odd

Posted by casey on March 17, 2015 in Grieving My Way, Writing Nook
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Today marks eight years since we started to navigate continuing our daily lives without Mom by our side.

Eight years.

I thought about letting it pass, as I haven’t been dwelling on it too much but then I never do really and as it always does it crept up on me, silent and staring and waiting for some sort of recognition.  Truthfully, that is how I feel about it, this day.

“Recognize Me” “Remember Me”

That in itself is a strange struggle each year.  Yes, it is a small struggle, but it is still there because despite knowing that it is in fact, just a day, those memories are always there. Each year I find it so strange as the concept of St. Patrick’s Day “celebrating” begins to spread or be planned for whether it is just in the community or at the boys’ schools or festive meals planned at home. Knowing me, you know that I tend to go all out for holidays, just like Mom did.

Even for St. Patrick’s Day she made it “a thing”.  I am sure you have heard me talk about the leprechaun that used to visit our house every year as kids.  We would try our best to set a trap for him, but that little guy always escaped leaving teeny footprints and mischief behind.  We were sure not to escape the house in anything but green and if she could add an “Irish” element here or there that day she did.

For me though, I struggle each year to “celebrate”.  I am SO thankful that it is a holiday that can easily go unacknowledged, but that feels strange too.  Yes, I put the boys in green and yes, this year I am making them a fun little lunch, but I just can’t fully embrace what could be the silliness of the day.  Fortunately it isn’t particularly weird to not say “Happy St. Patrick’s Day!” to people I run across today like it would be for Christmas, Easter, even Halloween but weird is how today seems to feel each year. Not particularly eloquent, elaborate or emotional, but honest.

Today is Weird.

If we had it our way today we would be celebrating, but celebrating Dana’s birthday with her, with Mom.  Instead we waver between the idea of celebrating and acknowledging with our kids yet another opportunity for some fun and the memories that seem to still be vivid in what is often not a steel trap for me, especially at almost 32 weeks pregnant with number three.

Yes, it has yet again been a year where I needed her.  With miscarriages and moves and memories made I needed her.  But won’t that always be the case? Shouldn’t that always be the case.  The day a child truly forgets that they had a mother, that they want or need a mother, the person who carried them and let their bodies grow them is the day it really gets weird.  And so I remain thankful.  Thankful for my mother in law who thinks of me as a daughter and works to treat me as so, thankful for friends who don’t tip-toe around but remember the loss and its effect just as much and thankful for their mothers’ who I think work to carry her doings on by still working to do things for me in thought, notes, showers and such.

This day will come each year, and she won’t be any more gone but the day will be remembered for what it was.  We will think on it perhaps, internally or to each other but it will be there and I think now, in looking at it for the day that it is, it will simply always feel a little odd.

“May the road rise to meet you, may the wind be always at your back, may the sunshine warm upon your face, the rain fall soft upon your fields, and until we meet again may God hold you softly in the hollow of his hand.” Irish Blessing

 
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“Again?”

Posted by casey on March 17, 2015 in Caden, Everett, Life as I Know It
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After what we all thought was our annual Texas ice storm with the bonus of an DSC_0019_edited-1actual snowfall we were all prepped and ready to move on with our seasons because that is about as wintery as winter gets in Texas.

With the news outlets all abuzz with the “drama” of the weather that unfolded it was hard to take much of their predictions and scenarios seriously as we continued to look at the weather report.  With the predicted possibility of snowing we went to bed one night and woke up to this…Colorado. Bright Colorado.

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But really, it was blown up against our doors and windows, piled on the patio and in general a white winter wonderland to look at. The real beauty?  No ice.  Just 6-7inches of pure, fresh snow! What?!

DSC_0013_edited-1Colter, unlike most of the working world, made it into work for a scheduled conference that was slightly delayed and he even called saying how strange it was driving in with it being so quiet out and completely and totally covered.  So there you go.

Naturally, the boys didn’t mind much that Mommy had been in Labor & Delivery the day prior and wanted to go play in the snow. Everett in particular.  Caden who remembered that it made him cold initially chose to stay indoors and then quickly changed his mini mind after seeing us “gear up”.  Who was I to tell them we couldn’t go out again to play after the past outings when there wasn’t a spot of ice to be found?

What they discovered in another “first real snow” sort of experience is that they weren’t even cold being bundled up and running around without all of the wind and wetness that accompanies the ice.  They scooped and snow angeled and romped and ran to their heart’s content.  And then one of them turned the snow on Mommy in the drop of a well…shutter.

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Naturally I had to waddle his direction and retaliate.

This was about the time the boys were seeing how easy this snowfall was sticking together.  But not before what you can spot in the background as a little monster digging in the small snow drifts pushed up on the garage.  In true little man style, scoop and toss was his favorite game of the morning.

“Watch this big one Mommy!” “See this big one Mommy?” “I’m super strong Mommy.”

Yes dear, yes you are.

It was a fabulous morning in the snow. I took a few pictures as you can see, then promptly put my camera down inside and spent the next forty five minutes simply being present and participating in their fun, which became my fun.  While I originally told them I didn’t think we would be able to make another snow man without Daddy, we soon learned that this snow was the real deal and our snowman redemption from birthday day was about to come to us.

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For years I have been talking of how no, you really can just roll it and it sticks like in the movies.  But that never happens here…only in Ohio.  Not this year my friends, not this year.  While Caden was hoarding some snow-balls I saw how easily it was compacting and had him make me one. As soon as I sat down and started to roll, I knew our Snowman was going to happen and both boys got right to work rolling away.  Teamwork at its finest. They rolled and I patted and shaped. The result?  Two perfectly sized Caden and Everett snowmen which made for two thrilled little boys.

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I think I should call these their first official snowmen since we haven’t had one of DSC_0023_edited-1substantial size or shape built since I was pregnant with Caden. Ta-Daaaaaaa !!!!

A success indeed.  With all the usual snow activities taken care of, including Caden’s favorite, snow eating we began to wrap it up. It took a long romp before anyone wanted to go inside this day, but when they did, they were satisfied and ready for our now expected after a whopping three/four snow days hot chocolate and bunny grahams.  In we went to de-gear by the door so Thrasher could delight in eating the snow off all of our clothes, de-thaw and revel in our triumph…and then sit on the couch the rest of the day so this baby would stay put.  To which he did.  So it was a win all way around and when you turn around to witness the snowman smooch occurring, you know that you’ve done good and their hearts and memories are full.

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Frozen

Posted by casey on March 14, 2015 in Uncategorized

Whether you have been here living it, or you certainly saw it on the news, we got a DSC_0850_edited-1bit of weather here recently like various parts of the country.  At first, the normal for Texas, ice.  You know it is coming at least once a year and while last year, it really did shut everything down this year the weathermen turned up the drama and really lived it up.  Texas news loves a good ice storm. What resulted in a couple of days off to begin with was taken advantage of because even in the ice, we try to get out and play a bit because typically it is the closest memory these kiddos will make to snow.  So as you can see, not enough to even fully cover the grass to start and out we go.

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Treacherous as it can be with ice underneath and a light dusting on top, boys wilDSC_0866_edited-1l still be boys.  What was most enjoyable this year was watching them decide what to do with it and I don’t know how, but Caden initiated the sibling snowball fight all on his own. Boys.  When in doubt, throw it.

They scooped it up, ran around, watched out dogs frolic and mod on inside to hot chocolate. Naturally. Of course we watched the snow predictions, and watched but didn’t fully expect to spend Caden’s official fifth birthday covered in large fluffy snowflakes! When it started we ran some errands which was quite the view as we expected it to come and go, but down, down, down it came.

Determined to get these boys some real snow experience, we bundled up for some more outdoor fun.  Thinking it would be more ice they were a little unsure and then in my ultimate mom win of the day, I drove them to our neighborhood park for a snowy rendezvous

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DSC_0941_edited-1I mean swinging in the snow? A rare option…and tricky to see!

While Caden was a little uneasy about the temperature, watching his brother dominate the accumulating snow piles on the slides tempted him enough to do the same.  Though Everett would go down on his belly and every which way giggling the whole time.

A park to ourselves filled with snow.  Perfection.

You know, minus the non-waterproof gloves because we live in Texas after all so our fingers are tingly and red and numb but painful.  Sacrifices.

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Untitled-1 And so Caden celebrated his fifth birthday in style.
A rare treat we talked about and what a fun memory…

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until the weather caused his party location to close down and cancel his “Big 5 Birthday Party”. Oh. My. All fun and snow days until it ruins your par-tay.

We tried to make up for it and yes, he is still having it, so in the meantime, we DSC_0950_edited-1waited for Daddy to come home from work so at long last he could birthday snow celebrate with us too since it was STILL COMING DOWN and did he ever.

I mean Daddies really are the best.

Especially when Mommy is huge-o preg-o and shuffling through the snow so as not to fall and have a disaster-o.  With lots of rounds of stripping down clothes into the dryer they were set to finally get to show Daddy all the snow-fun they had been learning to have.

You know, all the essentials.

Like the above snowball fights.

Or a traditional angel.

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 Even the non-traditional belly angel was displayed.

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 There was the “I am Daddy hear me roar!”, snow dumps on a squealing child begging for repetition.  Yes, he did it. Yes,  I documented it.

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Let us not forget the Texas sled.
Thank you Target Tupperware and Daddy motor.

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Last but certainly not least, was the wee-snow-man lump.  We gave it our best…but with a solid powder and not much moisture to compact it with this birthday snowman was as good as it was going to get, this time.

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And so we took on, and in my opinion conquered the birthday snow.  Thinking that this was our “big” annual snow we embraced its fun got a little frozen and happily camped out inside with puzzles and projects, movies and treats. Even with a cancelled birthday party we partied on our own and celebrated every bit of this “big 5″ boy’s actual birthday showing him that the snow itself that came down for his very own birthday was a special and rare surprise!  If only we knew what was coming the following week!

 
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Snow in Love

Posted by casey on March 5, 2015 in Everett, Life as I Know It, Snapshots

When you get to build a snowman,

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sometimes you turn around and catch someone sneaking a smooch.
I wonder if his first heartbreak will be remembered as that time his snow girlfriend went and got the nerve to go and melt on him.

 
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A Whole Hand

Posted by casey on March 1, 2015 in Caden, Caden's Chronicles

My sweet baby boy, the seven pound bundle who made me a mother turned five.
FIVE.

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A whole stinking hand of fingers to hold up.

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Oh my gracious.  My heart is so full.  The proudest of little men waking on his birthday morning Friday knowing that he had full and well moved into a new positionphoto 3 in this world, a five year old.  Love him so…and his baby brother who is trying to figure out why he is on the table. Photo bomb like woah Everett. Moving on.  While I am grateful that my not so little man can still display his age on his fingers, I is a challenge to wrap my brain around this particular birthday knowing that Kindergarten is approaching and his days of the “at home bubble” are drawing to a close.

DSC_0622_edited-1Caden is all boy, all kid these days.  So, when I get a snippet of a needed snuggle, or a little too often still cry-fest from his sensitive heart I am really taking note and taking part in trying to give him just what he needs right then because soon enough he just won’t need it the same anymore.  The days of needing me all the time for everything are long gone, which in many ways is so nice and just what we wait for in those years right?

Independence. A moment to breath. A moment to ourselves.

And then all of the sudden, all too soon that is exactly what you have.

An independent, opinionated, thought-forming, epiphany having child who is takingDSC_0758_edited-1 on the world himself in his own way filling your head with all of the new information he is saturated with from his daily fun-filled, learning centered, carefree life.

“Mommy! Did you know that 3 + 3 = 6?!”
“I need my water. Wah – Wah – Wah, that’s a ‘W’ Mom, water must start with ‘W’.”
“Can I read you a book Mommy? All by myself?”

(he does have a few he can read now filled with all of the sight words we have been working on)

Just this month, in preparation for his second baby photo 5brother he has been learning how to bathe himself.  You know, the details of it.  The, we will run the water and be in here but you do the scrubbing details of bathing.  Because truthfully, we all know that as soon as we start a bath, baby brother is going to want to nurse, have a blowout, need a bouncing session or just well…be crying.  I remember various steps in independence we took before Everett was born too and it is so interesting to see how they do or don’t take to it.

Last Bath at the Old House

Last Bath at the Old House

At first, when it was suggested to Caden via Daddy that he could start washing all on his own we got a resounding “But WHYYYYYYYYYY? Nooooooooo.  I don’t want to do it on my own, how can I?”  It was baffling. The exact opposite reaction from pretty much every other opportunity to do something on his own.  It was humorous a bit to see his concern as if this was a devastating stage of growing up, which in some ways, isn’t it though.  One more thing someone stops doing for you.  But then it clicked.  Mommy and Daddy do this and Mommy and Daddy are really big and I want DSC_0804_edited-1to be big (sidenote: tears…why must they want to be big?) so let’s do this.

A similar recent lesson in growing up.
Shoelaces.

Not in the plan really was switching to tennis shoes with laces only.  But you see there was a moving debacle.  Somewhere between school, sleepovers at Nonna’s and the various last minute bags, baskets, suitcases and yes, boxes Caden’s main tennis shoes have been misplaced.  I am hesitant to say lost, because I am still confident that once he can no longer fit into them at all, we will find and/or unpack them.  I waited and waited, just knowing they would turn up.  Then the weather got nicer (some days) and trips to the park were abundant and we signed up for soccer and…I was tired of hearing about his tennis shoes, so I ordered some more.

They came in, the same size as the others, but his little toes were crunching the ends.  Evidence of that nonstop eating.  Silly to be buying new ones halfway through the year that seem on the verge of being too small, I sent them back for a half-size up.  Sad to see his new shoes go back yet antsy to tear open the next box when it came, he jumped up and down and grinned because “NEW SHOES MOMMY!” …but wait, what is this, it can’t be, what will I do, I will never, no I can’t, this is awful…

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LACES.

I swear to you. Never, in his almost five years of life has he had a meltdown like he had over opening his new shoes and seeing that they no longer had independence friendly Velcro straps across the pseudo laces but real-deal, loop-swoop-and pull laces.  The ease of the world has officially ended and coping is not an option.

MELTDOWN.

be warned: apparently, once you get to 10.5c Nikes, not 10c, it’s laces only.

So drama and tear filled that no reason, no conversation, no anything was getting through and he had to go take a rest so the world could right itself again.  He just wasn’t believing that this was a step forward in childhood. Couldn’t be.  If you think about it, in a logic centered mind like his (thanks to his Daddy) why would going from being able to do it quickly and alone to the confusing task of tying laces be a good thing?

I felt your pain son.  But I also felt the pain of a headache from the meltdown and a hip-ache from squatting next to you while supporting baby brother to rationalize why exactly we could in fact handle this.  Five years old.

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So ready to grow up, but so many little moments of little-ness left.

(I’ll have you know that Caden is now quite proud of his laces only shoes just like Daddy’s and all the other big boys at the park including his newest 8 year old best neighborhood friend who he kind of stalks.  But that is another story.)

Let’s talk about some of those traits of little-ness that are left too. He sweetly still IMG_5290sleeps with his two “snuggle-bears” as he has always called them and I don’t see him parting with those anytime soon.  Unlike his little brother he has had and still has an aversion to the dark and loves having a jar of Christmas lights on, a dump-truck nightlight, a wall nightlight AND a light bear that puts stars on his ceiling.

Still along the lines of bedtime, while he may enjoy helping me read now, he also loves being read to (with his brother…two books…each night) and then always asks if I can lay with him and sing a few songs.  One day he won’t ask, I just know it.  After our goodnights and kisses in response to my “I love you, sweet dreams and sleep tight, ” he instructs me to have a “Tight, tight, tight, tight, tiiiiigggghhhhht rest too.”  Sleep tight. Get it?

Caden has his Daddy’s brain. I just know it.

DSC_0595_edited-1I swear I can actually see those little brain wheels spinning away at any given moment working out the details of any anything really works, functions, plays its part in life…a machine…a story…you get it.  He will figure it out.  He will work it out until it makes sense to him.  He will remember (and use) exactly what you answer him with.  So, we have to be particularly thoughtful about how we answer his questions because he really hangs on to that and reasons with it.  There is no “pulling a shade over his eyes” or going over his head, not that we the most patient parents in the history of the universe would ever, ever, ever attempt to do that to end the endless question string.  But really, I find myself thinking long and hard to give him honest but appropriate questions.  Answers he can roll around and work out the kinks in, but that he can then also report to his friends/family/teachers/parents that are truthful and do make sense to his thirty year old five year old brain.

“Mommy, why does the water when we wash our hands come our hot sometimes and come out cold other times?”

Well son.

You have to turn the handles different ways.  You remember those pipes we saw the workers putting in the ground?  Those pipes take the water into this tank here (water heater).  If we turn the handles that way, the tank heats up the water so it can be hot for us.  If we turn the handles this way it keeps it cold…

“Oh I get it, I know Mommy.  That cylinder changes the temperature of our water and

Showing Off His Schoolwork

Showing Off His Schoolwork

if it comes old cold Mommy, that’s okay Mommy, because that means we didn’t turn the handle to make the cylinder know that it needs to heat it up super hot.  So it’s okay Mommy, it can still do it if we want it to.  But Mommy?  If it gets too hot, will it explode and then we will have to call the firefighters because our alarm will go off and we will need a rescue?”

Yup…if he is satisfied, the conversation usually ends in something exploding.

Boys.

DSC_0572_edited-1But there is also another tidbit of current Caden in that conversation.  His worrier heart has been highly concerned about alarms as of late.  Where are they, when will they go off, how loud will they be, who will come, how will we know etc. Lots of reassuring on the subject of alarms.

Also lots of reassuring on the subject of God and Heaven and life these days.  I can’t be sure, but if he doesn’t end up being an engineer he just might end up being a minister.  His heart is so very spiritually inclined, which I think matches up with the sensitivity and gentleness of his nature. He has so enjoyed his Christian pre-school introductions and lessons and has also really used this to make sense of his world. He loves to tell us the different Bible stories he learns in Chapel and how they apply to the world or spontaneously drop to his knees to pray.

Yup.  Like in the middle of the stairs.photo 1

“I’m just praying to God Mommy.  I’m thanking him for all the stuff.”

I try my best not to giggle, because it is a fantastic trait and something I am glad he feels comfortable leaning on or turning to, but it is just so darn cute.  One day recently at the park, we were talking about what I nice day it was and he said, “Oh I know Mommy, you see this sunshine and these trees, and those blue sky clouds and the birds and this playground?  God made all of this Mommy because ‘God created the heavens and the Earth, Genesis One One’ (Genesis 1:1).”

Apply to life.
That is what he does.

And then there is this side of him…

photo foxThe sillies.

The noise-making, face contorting, imaginative, giggling, innocent filled giddy boy.

All Dressed and Ready for the Wedding of "Q and U" at school.

All Dressed and Ready for the Wedding of “Q and U” at school.

I am so proud of the heart this one has.  He is certain to be a class act, a gentlemen and a good citizen because he already carries these intentions in his almost five year old heart.  He holds the elevator open for everyone else to get out first every day at school, his please, thank yous and apologies are automatic, and his manners towards other adults and teachers are always evident.  That whole “so long as he takes our lessons and knows to use them outside of this home” when he is driving me bananas not listening, having attitude or being a mopey man mess at home is there.  What he tries to get away with at home he does not try to get away with outside of and wouldn’t dare try.  Not this child.

Message Sent.

I pray for the woman who steals his heart.  I pray that she care for him and love him and still lets me in because walking home from the park last week, he stopped his scooter, looked up at me waddling and not at DSC_0897_edited-1what I might consider looking my best and stated, “Mommy, you are the most boo-tee-full (beautiful) girl in the whole world.”  My heart swelled and his spontaneous affirmation of love and at knowing that one day, one day he will feel this away about a different girl.  For now though, at five, it is me and our family that holds his loving heart and is setting his mark…and his expectation for breakfast feasts.

This year, from four to five has been full.  It has overall been full of happiness, sillies, immense learning and growth.  The challenges such as repeating yourself fourteen times until you have to raise your voice to get your point/question/statement across have been much smaller than the joys that this age and stage has brought us.  Caden has been a whirwind of realizations, self made jokes, questions, affection and independence this year which has been really something to watch as a parent to our first-born.

photo bdayAs  the video games begin to take over, I can only hope that year five to six be as good to us as this past has been and that he holds strong to his heart and little man convictions as this next year will bring an end to the bubble of home and a beginning to the outside influences and input of all that is “big kid school”.  He is such a sweet, confident and now social young man already that we cannot wait to see him thrive in this next year, as he is setting the bar very high for his younger brothers, just as we knew he would.

Birthday Cookies He Helped Supervise for School

Birthday Cookies He Helped Supervise for School

Happy 5th Birthday Caden!

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