Mommy Sick Day

When I think of staying at home with my munchkin I feel blessed to have the opportunity to spend these years with him (soon to be them).    However, I must say that I would so very much like to have some “Mommy Sick Days” allotted into my benefits.  You know something where you wake up and know that you probably aren’t too capable of caring for yourself let alone a tiny human that day so a magic “Stay at Home Mom – Mommy Sick Day Fairy” who is more than qualified shows up to make you soup and entertain your child at the same time. 

Mary Poppins perhaps?
(minus all the dangerous flying stunts and spoonfuls of straight sugar)

Oh I see…you think I am being unreasonable.

While this isn’t the first time I wished for this fairy, it all started Saturday.  We attended a beautiful wedding and as the evening progressed noticed that Caden’s nose was running.  He proceeded to dance his pants off on the dance floor all until he tripped and faceplanted (literally) splitting open his top lip.  That made him realize that not only did his lip hurt but that he was quite tired as it was past bedtime.  As we were heading home he seemed to be sounding a bit more congested, I on the other hand only felt the soreness of my feet.  If only I knew what was to come.

Poor little man had the full blown head cold/congestion/snot fountain move in over night and woke up every hour to cry (with his eyes closed still more or less sleeping) as he felt worse and worse.   The hubs and I woke up with each of these cries as well assessing what was going on.  As each hour woke us I kept thinking “Man, my throat hurts.”  Strange.  Yeah, strange until about the fourth time I said that and then the rest hit.  I think I have been sneezing, and weak and blowing my nose ever since.

Yesterday the two of us were a pathetic mess.  I became more pathetic when my sweet angel baby of a son launched his full sippy cup at my face with a major league style pitch busting my nose.  No I wasn’t looking (cheap shot) not that my stellar catching skills would have done much doone anyway. I burst into tears, he burst into tears, the hubs didn’t know who to tend to first.  We have since decided that there surely is a crack on the right side of my nose since it hasn’t’ stopped throbbing and crunches when I blow my nose.  Yes…I said blow my cracked nose.  Remember?  Snot fountain.  So now, I can’t tell if my face hurts so bad because of sinus pressure/infection or because I am having to blow a broken nose every two minutes.

Don’t worry, I won’t be finding out an answer because in case you have forgotten, I’m pregnant.
So…I won’t be going to the doc to be put on any antibiotics that “should” be safe nor will my face be getting an x-ray.
(I mean…they can’t do anything anyway other than give me one of those cool nose pads.)

So here in a couple years when I am getting a nose job because of my son’s superb pitching skills I will tell you “No, it isn’t cosmetic at all it is because my son busted my nose a couple years back and it just hasn’t been the same since.” You will judge me and then I will re-post this as proof and although sure it will be cosmetic I will always have the excuse.  Come one, I’m trying to find the silver lining, work with me.

I have digressed.  Last night I did not sleep.  When I would get close to sleep the snot that was streaming towards my mouth out of one nostril would make me roll over (a true physical test these days) to find a Kleenex, wipe/blow the busted nose, wince and become more aware that the other nostril is completely plugged.  Add in sneezing fits of 6-10 sneezes in a row (that make me feel as if I might birth this child by sneezing), the nagging cough, the “please don’t swallow it hurts” throat a throbbing face and oh yes, the fact that I am 8 months pregnant and have a hard enough time sleeping as it is.  Therefore, as I said, last night I did not sleep.

In fact at 5 a.m. I decided I had tried long enough and spent the next 30 minutes sitting on the floor of a steaming shower.  If only it had helped.  My sweet hubs offered to stay home and wanted to to help, but I am banking on those days for when Baby #2 arrives so I wouldn’t let him.  Instead, I am sitting here waiting for my certified Mary Poppins to show up and rescue us…and wipe our noses.  Okay, just Caden’s nose.

He coughs I cough.
I wipe his nose while I am blowing mine.
He lays on my belly, brother kicks him.
We croak through “Brown Bear, Brown Bear” four million times.
He points to the back door and says “Go”.  I say “No”.
He cries. I cry.

Mommy Sick Day anyone?
If you see a strange lady flying through the air by umbrella send her my way please.